If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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