We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
