i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
