it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
