cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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