erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
