wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
