i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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