week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
