so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
