420 ftw
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
