for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize
