Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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