Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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