idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I want to make a zoo with you.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Fuck me I smell like cheese
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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