We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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