her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
