their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
