As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
