she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
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