I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Randomize
