Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
