whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
