biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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