four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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