yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
