He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Randomize
