Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
