just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
