return my video game
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Randomize
