you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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