True but thats because hes a fetus.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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