it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize