I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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