There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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