we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
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