I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize