dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize
