i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
