do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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