U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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