Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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