Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
