I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Randomize
