I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
they're like a gay fantastic four
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
