Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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