I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
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