is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
