The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
