he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
