We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
