is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
