I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Randomize
