did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
